Limb Lengthening Forum
Limb Lengthening Surgery => Height & Proportions => Topic started by: Taller on November 09, 2014, 12:43:53 AM
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Are you naturally shorter than your father or mother? If so, has this contributed significantly to your height neurosis?
Personally, I am somewhere around 3-3.5inches (7 to 9 CM) shorter than my father, which led to me frequently feeling as though I wasn't as much of as a man as him while growing up. I no longer feel that height determines manliness, as stupid of a concept as that even is, but, being shorter, I often feel inadequate, and as though I didn't meet my expectations of myself as an adult, even though everyone in my circle of family and friends has always told me that my height it fine, even though I am the shortest male, and that I was/am a wonderful person and so on.
Furthermore, I always felt too submissive around my father and taller male relatives, and, in my late teens, was felt really awkward about not ever "measuring up" to them, meaning that, when I failed to achieve as much in an area as they had at a given age, I felt inferior, both physically and mentally. I once felt that I could never become the man, inspiration, and leader my father was to me and others with a noticeably shorter height.
I also witnessed most of my friends growing taller than their fathers while I remained much shorter than mine. This, too, contributed to my feeling of inadequacy and being "different". I can definitely say that the height difference was a big factor in my development of height neurosis and self-confidence issues during my early years.
Years have passed, and I've since conquered the self-confidence issues and am very happy with the direction my adult life is taking. I do realize that my feelings were irrational and I have come a long way in becoming the person I dream of being. My father and I enjoy a very healthy relationship. I do not feel that my height is holding me back much, if at all, but my height neurosis still remains and I still beat myself up about height and get jealous of other people who are taller, although I don't act on those feelings besides participating in this forum and contemplating LL. I did go to a psychologist and they did nothing to get rid of the height neurosis. They confirmed that I am not depressed, and I am otherwise quite mentally healthy and stable. I just happen to have strong height dysphoria that I'm absolutely sick and tired of.
Can any of you relate? How did your own height differences compared to family members affect you mentally?
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Do you try to overcompensate often for your height?
Cause to me it sounds like you've got a napoleon complex, At your height 179-181cm it seems a bit weird even if you're shorter than your dad, I don't think that your psychologist's where very competent. I don't think that you're "quite mentally healthy and stable" if you're considering this highly invasive surgery. Have you ever experienced heightism in a real life social situation?
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Thank you very much for sharing your view of the situation. Yes I'm 179CM, but that's only 2CM taller than you are. If I am mentally unstable just for considering LL, then perhaps by that logic you are too. Human happiness is not a logical behavior, unfortunately. I always dreamt of being tall, and I fully expected to be as well, since my father is so tall.
I do try to overcompensate for my height, and I'm aware of it and trying to get rid of this irrational behavior. I often perceive that people are nicer and more willing to listen to the taller guys, but I use a few techniques to overcome this, such as being more outgoing and sociable and making extra effort to dress and act nicely. Height discrimination is really not enough of an issue to warrant LL. There is no real discrimination at 179CM.
But even in realizing this, I still want to be taller to match mental image of myself. This is probably the real reason I want to undergo the procedure. Even though I've realized the illogical and irrational nature of my height neurosis, it won't go away. The only explanation for it that makes sense to me is that I want to improve myself to match my dream version of myself, which I feel I shouldn've been all along.
This thread isn't made to justify my desire for LL either. I wrote about my experience to show how being shorter than my father impacted me psychologically as I finished physical development.
Thank you very much for your input though. I do really appreciate it.
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It sounds like you take this too seriously, I know a lot of people who are shorter than their dad (like me) and the common feeling is like you always thought you're going to be as tall as your dad and you're a bit sad about that. But that's it.
But to me it looks like you have a serious problem, you're mind is set on LL, I mean look at your posts, I think you have the most on this forum but you're not even an LL patient. This looks like some sort of addiction. I really don't want to encourage you to do LL, not because you're tall but because I don't want anyone to suffer as much as I did. I would like to say that you should try to forget this but I think you already tried that. Maybe LL would really help you, but only because you think that you need that although you don't. Anyways, good luck!
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I can relate alot to what you wrote Taller but I don't think my insecurity runs as deep as yours. I took it very hard when I realized I wasn't growing anymore and yes it feels horrible to be much shorter than your dad it really does wreck havoc with your self-esteem. That doesn't mean there is something wrong with your brain, alot of people on here say we're crazy because supposedly the average height in english speaking countries is 5'10 so it has to be our problem.
I remember you wrote you sometimes go places where 188 CM seems barely average. It sounded strange but yesterday I saw what you meant: Me and dad were in Stockholm to see the premiere of a new movie and we had some time to kill which we did by walking around downtown (it's beautiful with the water and everything). Now my dad is not short he's around 187CM and while I'm bad at eye measurments and easily fooled by posture, the slope of the sidewalk, distance and the fact that he was carrying a heavy backpack but he still looked so small. You guys probably won't believe me but about a third of all the men were well above 190CM. I felt like a child, maybe 10-15 people out of hundreds were shorter than me that's when I knew I would never be tall where I live. I'm just hoping I can get to a point where I don't feel dwarfed in a crowd.
Sorry about all the text but I had to get that off my chest. Anyway what i meant to say is: it's okay to want to feel normal and to be proud of yourself. If you don't feel short don't do the operation it's not worth it to go from good to better but it may be a good decision if it helps to get rid of what feels like a heavy weight dragging you down every morning. If I were a decimeter taller I swear I wouldn't allow myself to be bitter. You're not crazy for wanting the surgery taller and when you get to point where you can finally accept yourself you'll be happy again. Everyone deserves that doesn't matter if you're 160CM or 190CM.
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I can relate alot to what you wrote Taller but I don't think my insecurity runs as deep as yours. I took it very hard when I realized I wasn't growing anymore and yes it feels horrible to be much shorter than your dad it really does wreck havoc with your self-esteem. That doesn't mean there is something wrong with your brain, alot of people on here say we're crazy because supposedly the average height in english speaking countries is 5'10 so it has to be our problem.
I remember you wrote you sometimes go places where 188 CM seems barely average. It sounded strange but yesterday I saw what you meant: Me and dad were in Stockholm to see the premiere of a new movie and we had some time to kill which we did by walking around downtown (it's beautiful with the water and everything). Now my dad is not short he's around 187CM and while I'm bad at eye measurments and easily fooled by posture, the slope of the sidewalk, distance and the fact that he was carrying a heavy backpack but he still looked so small. You guys probably won't believe me but about a third of all the men were well above 190CM. I felt like a child, maybe 10-15 people out of hundreds were shorter than me that's when I knew I would never be tall where I live. I'm just hoping I can get to a point where I don't feel dwarfed in a crowd.
Sorry about all the text but I had to get that off my chest. Anyway what i meant to say is: it's okay to want to feel normal and to be proud of yourself. If you don't feel short don't do the operation it's not worth it to go from good to better but it may be a good decision if it helps to get rid of what feels like a heavy weight dragging you down every morning. If I were a decimeter taller I swear I wouldn't allow myself to be bitter. You're not crazy for wanting the surgery taller and when you get to point where you can finally accept yourself you'll be happy again. Everyone deserves that doesn't matter if you're 160CM or 190CM.
that's pushing it
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Thanks for your post Uppland. Stockholm is definitely a beautiful city indeed, especially in the evening!
I don't think that we experience any real discrimination at 179CM though. I just feel so far from the height I dreamed of being and often feel small, kind of like what you stated.
Have you talked with your friends or family about your feelings? I eventually did so after years of keeping it in and it proved very therapeutic, morsoe than the dumb psychologist I saw once.
This forum is also a great place to talk about these kinds of feelings relating to height. You're right, sometimes it feels great to get pent up frustrations off your chest and share them with others.
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I can relate alot to what you wrote Taller but I don't think my insecurity runs as deep as yours. I took it very hard when I realized I wasn't growing anymore and yes it feels horrible to be much shorter than your dad it really does wreck havoc with your self-esteem. That doesn't mean there is something wrong with your brain, alot of people on here say we're crazy because supposedly the average height in english speaking countries is 5'10 so it has to be our problem.
I remember you wrote you sometimes go places where 188 CM seems barely average. It sounded strange but yesterday I saw what you meant: Me and dad were in Stockholm to see the premiere of a new movie and we had some time to kill which we did by walking around downtown (it's beautiful with the water and everything). Now my dad is not short he's around 187CM and while I'm bad at eye measurments and easily fooled by posture, the slope of the sidewalk, distance and the fact that he was carrying a heavy backpack but he still looked so small. You guys probably won't believe me but about a third of all the men were well above 190CM. I felt like a child, maybe 10-15 people out of hundreds were shorter than me that's when I knew I would never be tall where I live. I'm just hoping I can get to a point where I don't feel dwarfed in a crowd.
Sorry about all the text but I had to get that off my chest. Anyway what i meant to say is: it's okay to want to feel normal and to be proud of yourself. If you don't feel short don't do the operation it's not worth it to go from good to better but it may be a good decision if it helps to get rid of what feels like a heavy weight dragging you down every morning. If I were a decimeter taller I swear I wouldn't allow myself to be bitter. You're not crazy for wanting the surgery taller and when you get to point where you can finally accept yourself you'll be happy again. Everyone deserves that doesn't matter if you're 160CM or 190CM.
Ok, I'll be visiting Stockholm soon then, need to check if this is true or if you're just delusional.
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Thanks for your post Uppland. Stockholm is definitely a beautiful city indeed, especially in the evening!
I don't think that we experience any real discrimination at 179CM though. I just feel so far from the height I dreamed of being and often feel small, kind of like what you stated.
Have you talked with your friends or family about your feelings? I eventually did so after years of keeping it in and it proved very therapeutic, morsoe than the dumb psychologist I saw once.
This forum is also a great place to talk about these kinds of feelings relating to height. You're right, sometimes it feels great to get pent up frustrations off your chest and share them with others.
spot on
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Ok, I'll be visiting Stockholm soon then, need to check if this is true or if you're just delusional.
Go downtown on a saturday night. I'd think it was a coincidence but the next day we were at a large store and most men there we're the same height as dad or taller and I only saw two people my height or shorter, I wish I was joking.
Really bad at estimating others height though but I know dad is 187 albeit with lousy posture.
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Thanks for your post Uppland. Stockholm is definitely a beautiful city indeed, especially in the evening!
I don't think that we experience any real discrimination at 179CM though. I just feel so far from the height I dreamed of being and often feel small, kind of like what you stated.
Have you talked with your friends or family about your feelings? I eventually did so after years of keeping it in and it proved very therapeutic, morsoe than the dumb psychologist I saw once.
This forum is also a great place to talk about these kinds of feelings relating to height. You're right, sometimes it feels great to get pent up frustrations off your chest and share them with others.
Yeah that was the first thing I did but they were not very understanding. They tried to help me and all but they were convinced I was experiencing a "normal" depression because I was run-down and that it would pass by itself (it hasn't and I doubt it will). They've been very supportive but they keep on telling me I'm perfect the way I am they're big on that kind of stuff.
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that's pushing it
yeah getting ll at 190 is kinda lame. I just meant everyone should be able to accept themselves and if you need to change something that's okay.
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My Dad claimed he was 6'1.5" when he was my age but I kinda doubt it since he's now 5'11". He was realistically 6'0"-6'0.5" and added an inch.
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My Dad claimed he was 6'1.5" when he was my age but I kinda doubt it since he's now 5'11". He was realistically 6'0"-6'0.5" and added an inch.
How tall is your mother, since you were predicted to be 6'4?
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How tall is your mother, since you were predicted to be 6'4?
189-190cm ;D ;D ;D
Adult height for male = mother height+ father height +13 cm) / 2
I smell bull >_>
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How tall is your mother, since you were predicted to be 6'4?
Mom claims 5'5.5" but her physical states she's 5'4.5".
189-190cm ;D ;D ;D
Adult height for male = mother height+ father height +13 cm) / 2
I smell bulls**t >_>
Yes it is. There is no way to predict your final height. Your extremely likely going to be as tall or similar height to your father unless your maternal side has guys taller than him. I did stunt my growth very likely since I'm a 14 us but probably not by a lot.
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Mom claims 5'5.5" but her physical states she's 5'4.5".
Yes it is. There is no way to predict your final height. Your extremely likely going to be as tall or similar height to your father unless your maternal side has guys taller than him. I did stunt my growth very likely since I'm a 14 us but probably not by a lot.
I am sorry, But i don't get you... at all.
Whats you'r stats ?
Sitting height
arm length
leg length
wingspan
ulna length
knee height
tibia/femur ratio
and etc.
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I am sorry, But i don't get you... at all.
Whats you'r stats ?
Sitting height
arm length
leg length
wingspan
ulna length
knee height
tibia/femur ratio
and etc.
Not sure. Never bothered to measure them. But if I were do I just use a fabric measure? Allthough I'm gonna use feet and inches since I'm American.
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Bloody hell, How could you consider LL if you don't even know if you're a good candidate?
You can use any tape measure, Just keep it straight.
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He's only in it for 5CM I think (2 inches in imperial) so I doubt he will have much to worry about unless his legs/arms are unusual in some way.
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He's only in it for 5CM I think (2 inches in imperial) so I doubt he will have much to worry about unless his legs/arms are unusual in some way.
Yes, But it will be good to have some genuine 6'1" data, Since that's the height i am interested in.
And usually proportions vary quite a lot on this site.
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He's only in it for 5CM I think (2 inches in imperial) so I doubt he will have much to worry about unless his legs/arms are unusual in some way.
I will probably have to hit the gym more often cause I noticed 6'3"+ guys have broader shoulders than 6'0"-6'2" guys. I'm almost %100 certain I'll be okayed to do ll. I've never had any mental breakdowns due to it and my proportions won't be tampered in a 2-3" gain. But I've posted my stats on my sig. I think they're reasonably accurate but then again Im not %100 sure how to do it.
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Starting height: 185.5cms Goal/ dream height:190-193cms!
Sitting height:124 cms Arm Length: 86.5 cms
Leg length:104 cms
124cm sitting height ;D ;D ;D ;D
104cm Leg length ;D ;D ;D ;D
You crack me up!
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124cm sitting height ;D ;D ;D ;D
104cm Leg length ;D ;D ;D ;D
You crack me up!
Ok wise guy. How did you do it since you seem to know it all about ll.
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Ok wise guy. How did you do it since you seem to know it all about ll.
Sit on a flat surface, Straighten up your spine and make a mark where the top of your head ends, Then measure the distance between the flat surface and the mark that you made.
Whats your wingspan? (I assume you can measure it)
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Measure your arms from the end of your middle finger to your acrimion bone (you can search for it with your hands it won't be visible but you can feel it). If your arms really are 86CM you could easily be 195 at least that's what the numbers say.
If you divide your desired height -say 191CM- by your arm lenght -86CM- you'll get a value: -2,22...-. 2,2-2,4 is normal and should look fine so you should be in the clear.
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My Femurs are only slightly longer than my Tibias if I did this correctly so it may be best for me to lengthen my Femurs.
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If your sitting height is 94CM, then it makes sense that you'd have long limbs, meaning that you'd have a huge armspan, which is great for LL. Calic has a sitting height under 90CM and he went to 5'10.5 from 5'7 and still looked amazing afterwards, in large part due to his long arms.
With a 94CM sitting height, you could go up to 6'3 and still be within the common, natural range of proportions.
How long are your femurs relative to your torso. Watch yourself squatting from a side perspective in a mirror to get a sense of this.
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If your sitting height is 94CM, then it makes sense that you'd have long limbs, meaning that you'd have a huge armspan, which is great for LL. Calic has a sitting height under 90CM and he went to 5'10.5 from 5'7 and still looked amazing afterwards, in large part due to his long arms.
With a 94CM sitting height, you could go up to 6'3 and still be within the common, natural range of proportions.
Thanks I appreciate it. Gonna aim for 6'3" and maybe 6'5" in the future.
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Thanks I appreciate it. Gonna aim for 6'3" and maybe 6'5" in the future.
Don't push it buddy, 6'5" with 94cm sitting height is 47.95918367346939%
Most legitimate doctors if not all won't let you go over 50% SHR, 94x100 = 9400 / 0.50 = 188cm
So you see you're already capping your proportions at 190cm, 49.47368421052632% SHR is not that baad, But i wouldn't go over it.
And most caucasian men have a SHR of: 52-54% (idle) , There are some extremes tho.
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Don't push it buddy, 6'5" with 94cm sitting height is 47.95918367346939%
Most legitimate doctors if not all won't let you go over 50% SHR, 94x100 = 9400 / 0.50 = 188cm
So you see you're already capping your proportions at 190cm, 49.47368421052632% SHR is not that baad, But i wouldn't go over it.
I'm fine with that. 188cm is the bare minimum I want but If I stop at just under 6'3" I'll be plenty satisfied with my lengthening.
But you don't think I could do 2" on femurs and tibias w/o looking strange?
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I'm fine with that. 188cm is the bare minimum I want but If I stop at just under 6'3" I'll be plenty satisfied with my lengthening.
But you don't think I could do 2" on femurs and tibias w/o looking strange?
I doubt that even i wound bat an eye on your proportions if you went for 6'3" and choose correctly between tibias and femurs.
You already have long limbs (like me) so it wouldn't be wise to go overkill.
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Well I could probably get to 6'4" but no question I can get to 6'3" w/o looking strange.
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Well I could probably get to 6'4" but no question I can get to 6'3" w/o looking strange.
If i where you, I wouldn't do it tbh. Cause this would mean having an negative ape index.
You could theoretically do it, But at the cost of your current proportions and you won't meet many people at your new height that have less or the same sitting height as you, They would probably sit 2.5-3.5 inches higher than you at the same 193cm height, You know whats best for you tho.
If your Ape Index is not even 1 (Index 1), or negative (Index 2) your friends can call you T-Rex.
If it is near 1 (Index 1) or 0 (Index 2) some Italians may ask you if they can paint you - nked.
If it is more than 1 (Index 1) or positive (Index 2) you can pick up things from the ground without bending your knees to much.
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Don't push it buddy, 6'5" with 94cm sitting height is 47.95918367346939%
Most legitimate doctors if not all won't let you go over 50% SHR, 94x100 = 9400 / 0.50 = 188cm
So you see you're already capping your proportions at 190cm, 49.47368421052632% SHR is not that baad, But i wouldn't go over it.
And most caucasian men have a SHR of: 52-54% (idle) , There are some extremes tho.
LOL'd at all the decimal places. If I were you, Ajax2thousand20, I'd go for 6'3 and a maximum of 6'4, which is what you wanted and were predicted to be when growing anyways. I see no advantage of being 6'5 over 6'4 when you'd look less proportionate and society doesn't prefer one height over the other.
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LOL'd at all the decimal places. If I were you, Ajax2thousand20, I'd go for 6'3 and a maximum of 6'4, which is what you wanted and were predicted to be when growing anyways. I see no advantage of being 6'5 over 6'4 when you'd look less proportionate and society doesn't prefer one height over te other.
Well then 6'3" or 6'4" is it and done with ll! Well I'm glad to be in the clear for it! Didn't want to be over 6'6" even as a pubescent anyway.
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I know I'm late, but oh well... :)
Yes, I'm naturally shorter than my same-gender parent, aka. my father. He's about 6 cm taller. My family thought I would grow to become as tall as him, but that didn't happen. I hoped I would, but I'm not allowing it to affect my self-esteem.
Do you have any siblings? If so, what is their height, and how tall are you compared to them? I have an elder brother and an elder sister, and I'm 6-7 cm shorter than my brother and 6-7 cm taller than my sister. According to the formula, adult height for male = (mother's height+ father's height +13 cm) / 2, I'm pretty much exactly as tall as expected. How about you?
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If you have taller than average parents, you'll often grow up to be shorter. It's called regression to the mean.
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If you have taller than average parents, you'll often grow up to be shorter. It's called regression to the mean.
My father is about 178 and I'm about 172 - he was mean height, and I got shorter. Explain that...looks like "regression out of the mean" to me. But I guess outliers exist and genetics can do that to you.
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I believe it's about the height difference between the parents, not the height of the parents themselves. Generally, the greater the difference, the further your height is dragged down due to your shorter parent.
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http://www.limblengtheningforum.com/index.php?topic=3111.0
:)