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Author Topic: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?  (Read 411 times)

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Apparition

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Two of my best friends are tall white women (178cm/5'10" and 183cm/6'0" respectively). I confided in them that I wanted to do LL to reach 183cm/6'0" or at least 180cm/5'11" so I could stop being short and recover my self esteem and confidence. They both started trying to talk me out of it, saying stuff like "you'll never be able to run fast or exercise again if you do it", "if you're making enough to afford it you're already not one of the wage gap disadvantaged short people", "you'll still be unhappy after you do it, you'll still be comparing yourself to natural tall people and taller people than yourself", "you could use that money on yourself so many other ways", "I would feel really bad if you got crippled for life", etc.

I know they care a lot about my well being but I know for a fact they at least passively enjoy their own tall heights and as tall white women, they have absolutely zero idea what life and society can be like as a short Asian guy (...aside from a parallel dating disadvantage which is still contextualized differently because tall women are at least statistically advantaged at everything aside from dating while short men are disadvantaged at everything). I don't think it's fair for them to try to stop me considering that they're happy about being tall themselves and have never had to be way below average height, or below average at all.

I know my current height is already "not really that bad" as far as things can go, but 169cm is still only the 10th male percentile in the western world, and I was actually 165cm/5'4" for the great majority of my post-puberty life until a very late 4cm "growth spurt" got me to 169 at all.
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Starting height: 169cm / 5'7"

Goal height: 182cm / almost 6'0"

GrowTow

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #1 on: April 20, 2019, 04:27:20 PM »

I don't think it helps your confidence having such tall friends that are women. Here in the Uk the average height for a woman is 5'5-6. So you have ended up with possibly the tallest possible duo friends out there.

Height surgery shouldn't be done to help your personality out etc.. If you're having dating problems now, you're going to continue to have them. I'm 5'4 but I do wear 2 inch lifts so lets say i'm 5'6. I have no problem with women. I will be doing this only for the height increase.

You seem to be blaming all your problems onto your height. They'll be no difference if you do that.

I'd suggest you lengthen up to 176cm which 5'9. Average height in the UK and USA. Also you should realise every man on this planet adds 2 inches to their height. You may think 5'9 will be short. But it will be 5'10 with regular shoes. Plus, people will tell you you're 6ft simply because they're 5'10 too but tell everyone they're 6ft.

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myloginacc

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #2 on: April 20, 2019, 04:53:30 PM »

I don't think ~170cm is short for a lot of Asian groups.

Think pretty heavily about LL. Your friends are right in wanting you to think this through.
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Formerly myloginacct; had issues with my login account.
Yes I do want to add, before doing this surgery, ask yourself if you have optimized your life to the fullest extent possible (job/career, personality, etc).

Betagur7

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #3 on: April 20, 2019, 05:06:19 PM »

So you are basically 5’6-5’7. Roughly same height as me. I’m black btw and I experience the same. I don’t plan on telling anyone about getting surgery because I know they’d react the same way your friends did. Being short and male seems like something people can sympathize with ONLY if they are short and male too.
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myloginacc

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #4 on: April 20, 2019, 06:01:08 PM »

Most people here will still feel short at anything under 5'11 if they feel short at 170cm, which is only below average. The BDD here needs to be talked of more seriously.
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Formerly myloginacct; had issues with my login account.
Yes I do want to add, before doing this surgery, ask yourself if you have optimized your life to the fullest extent possible (job/career, personality, etc).

Apparition

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #5 on: April 20, 2019, 10:26:58 PM »

I don't think it helps your confidence having such tall friends that are women. Here in the Uk the average height for a woman is 5'5-6. So you have ended up with possibly the tallest possible duo friends out there.

Height surgery shouldn't be done to help your personality out etc.. If you're having dating problems now, you're going to continue to have them. I'm 5'4 but I do wear 2 inch lifts so lets say i'm 5'6. I have no problem with women. I will be doing this only for the height increase.

You seem to be blaming all your problems onto your height. They'll be no difference if you do that.

I'd suggest you lengthen up to 176cm which 5'9. Average height in the UK and USA. Also you should realise every man on this planet adds 2 inches to their height. You may think 5'9 will be short. But it will be 5'10 with regular shoes. Plus, people will tell you you're 6ft simply because they're 5'10 too but tell everyone they're 6ft.

I'm not blaming problems on my height actually. I know I have a lot of insecurities and I'm working on all of them at the same time. I've learned to live with some insecurities and I'm working my way through the others purely mentally, in therapy. Height is the only thing I cannot mentally get over and I don't blame all my life problems on it. I brought up examples of problems because short men are statistically disadvantaged at every aspect of life, which is true.
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Starting height: 169cm / 5'7"

Goal height: 182cm / almost 6'0"

Apparition

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #6 on: April 20, 2019, 10:31:42 PM »

I don't think ~170cm is short for a lot of Asian groups.

Think pretty heavily about LL. Your friends are right in wanting you to think this through.

I never made it to actual 170cm, my ethnicity's average height is 173 and I spent most of my life at 165. I only found out literally weeks ago that I had late final growth to 169 and was no longer 165.

170 isn't unusually short among Asians but it's in the range of "your entire race is all short and you are just as identically short as the rest of your race" from the perspective of taller races. It doesn't feel good/better just because other Asians are short too.

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Starting height: 169cm / 5'7"

Goal height: 182cm / almost 6'0"

myloginacc

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #7 on: April 21, 2019, 12:36:03 AM »

Pretty sure 170cm is basically the average male height for our species, and some groups (namely Northern Europeans and East Africans) are a lot taller than the average.

Still, people like Jeff Bezos never allowed their height to hold them back. You guys can keep crying here forever about how short you are at 170cm, for all I care. You all can either learn to accept your bodies or go get your bones broken for a year.
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Formerly myloginacct; had issues with my login account.
Yes I do want to add, before doing this surgery, ask yourself if you have optimized your life to the fullest extent possible (job/career, personality, etc).

Apparition

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #8 on: April 21, 2019, 01:09:04 AM »

Pretty sure 170cm is basically the average male height for our species, and some groups (namely Northern Europeans and East Africans) are a lot taller than the average.

Still, people like Jeff Bezos never allowed their height to hold them back. You guys can keep crying here forever about how short you are at 170cm, for all I care. You all can either learn to accept your bodies or go get your bones broken for a year.

Dude, I'm not even full 170 and I was 165 for the vast majority of my life. I'm below average in both countries I have citizenship in. I'm still the second or third shortest guy I know. 169cm is more accurately 5'6.5", which I'm sure the vast majority of people here would still agree is short enough to be read as short. And I am aware part of it is a mental health problem and I'm not under any illusions that becoming taller will change anything in my life aside from my mental health.

I've seen you be fairly civil and empathetic with almost everyone on this forum, including my previous post, and including the guys here who are naturally 5'11"-6'1". Why are you being so abrasive with me?
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Starting height: 169cm / 5'7"

Goal height: 182cm / almost 6'0"

myloginacc

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #9 on: April 21, 2019, 04:52:07 PM »

Sorry about that. However, I disagree with the notion 169~170cm is short. There are billions of men at this range. There's clearly a lot of BDD being perpetuated here. Somehow, 175cm is an average height where height dysphoria goes away for most posters, but they're short, disadvantaged, rejected "manlets" at 170cm. A 5cm difference. I'm starting to think this is almost as bad as the men who are 5'10+ and still want to get this. I apologize for the rudeness; I'm just completely done with that mentality.
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Formerly myloginacct; had issues with my login account.
Yes I do want to add, before doing this surgery, ask yourself if you have optimized your life to the fullest extent possible (job/career, personality, etc).

wants2growtaller

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #10 on: April 22, 2019, 12:13:21 AM »

These women have no idea what its like to be a minority and be short. Its BRUTAL! Dont listen to them. They are trying to talk you out of it because they dont want you to reap the benefits of being tall.
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Some of us may have ''grown'' in stature. But it seems the majority of us have yet to grow in humanity

Betagur7

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #11 on: April 24, 2019, 12:07:05 PM »

Okay first if you do the math there isn’t billions of men that are 169-170 cm out there. Second when I went to do my consultation I was told I was in the 15 percentile of men at 170 cm so you really can’t say majority of men are 169-170 cm in height lol. In high school I was the shortest or tied for the shortest in every class. Really think that even though 169 - 170 would’ve been decent or dam near average half a century ago, it is actually really short for a guy now.
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ned_flanders

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #12 on: April 24, 2019, 01:22:30 PM »

Two of my best friends are tall white women (178cm/5'10" and 183cm/6'0" respectively). I confided in them that I wanted to do LL to reach 183cm/6'0" or at least 180cm/5'11" so I could stop being short and recover my self esteem and confidence. They both started trying to talk me out of it, saying stuff like "you'll never be able to run fast or exercise again if you do it", "if you're making enough to afford it you're already not one of the wage gap disadvantaged short people", "you'll still be unhappy after you do it, you'll still be comparing yourself to natural tall people and taller people than yourself", "you could use that money on yourself so many other ways", "I would feel really bad if you got crippled for life", etc.

I know they care a lot about my well being but I know for a fact they at least passively enjoy their own tall heights and as tall white women, they have absolutely zero idea what life and society can be like as a short Asian guy (...aside from a parallel dating disadvantage which is still contextualized differently because tall women are at least statistically advantaged at everything aside from dating while short men are disadvantaged at everything). I don't think it's fair for them to try to stop me considering that they're happy about being tall themselves and have never had to be way below average height, or below average at all.

I know my current height is already "not really that bad" as far as things can go, but 169cm is still only the 10th male percentile in the western world, and I was actually 165cm/5'4" for the great majority of my post-puberty life until a very late 4cm "growth spurt" got me to 169 at all.

ehm.. they are mostly right dude?

"you'll never be able to run fast or exercise again if you do it" - Correct.

 "if you're making enough to afford it you're already not one of the wage gap disadvantaged short people" - Correct but dont see the point of the argument

 "you'll still be unhappy after you do it, you'll still be comparing yourself to natural tall people and taller people than yourself" - Correct, many LLers come back for 2nd LL.

 "you could use that money on yourself so many other ways" - Correct,  a premium surgeon is like 75k$+. Could pay mortage ffs.

 "I would feel really bad if you got crippled for life" - Correct. Crippled for life there are some cases, but crippled for 5-10 years there are more! so you wanna waste your peak years of your youth in wheelchair or limited functionality?
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finished lengthening 5.5cm femur stryde 2019.
I am not sure if it was worth it :/

Betagur7

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #13 on: April 24, 2019, 01:47:57 PM »

Get the feeling that the people who are arguing against it are guys 5’4-5’5 who currently getting surgery to become 5’7. Know it’s tough but got to say it, 5’7 is short too. I read some of the personals on here and from what I’ve seen guys who got surgery to lengthen to 5’7 had to go back for extra lengthening.
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myloginacc

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #14 on: April 24, 2019, 01:56:25 PM »

Okay first if you do the math there isn’t billions of men that are 169-170 cm out there. Second when I went to do my consultation I was told I was in the 15 percentile of men at 170 cm so you really can’t say majority of men are 169-170 cm in height lol. In high school I was the shortest or tied for the shortest in every class. Really think that even though 169 - 170 would’ve been decent or dam near average half a century ago, it is actually really short for a guy now.

The world isn't your US (or whatever) high school.

Also, it's like a 5cm difference to average or really close to average in a majority of countries. If you want to live your whole life thinking of that as "really short", go ahead, be my guest.
« Last Edit: April 24, 2019, 02:17:16 PM by myloginacc »
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Formerly myloginacct; had issues with my login account.
Yes I do want to add, before doing this surgery, ask yourself if you have optimized your life to the fullest extent possible (job/career, personality, etc).

Betagur7

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #15 on: May 02, 2019, 11:26:30 AM »

But I don’t live in those countries tf? I live in US average height is 5’10. I plan on staying in US as well. I’m pretty sure if everyone was easily satisfied  with the thought that somewhere in a country far far away there are men on average who are same height as them this forum wouldn’t even exist.
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Nietzsche

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #16 on: May 02, 2019, 01:21:21 PM »

My parents persuaded me outta this surgery.

But I didnt give in.I opted to seek job in future for my surgery
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Why god go silent when your in misery???

0184946

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #17 on: May 06, 2019, 08:48:23 PM »

Get the feeling that the people who are arguing against it are guys 5’4-5’5 who currently getting surgery to become 5’7. Know it’s tough but got to say it, 5’7 is short too. I read some of the personals on here and from what I’ve seen guys who got surgery to lengthen to 5’7 had to go back for extra lengthening.

5'7 is short but presentable, many guys that height. 5'3,5'4,5'5,5'6 not  presentable unless muscular. But yeah I'm not stopping at 5'7 either. I'm 161cm
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0184946

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #18 on: May 06, 2019, 08:50:59 PM »

169cm is a good height for LL it's almost 5'7 and you will probably be happy and done with LL once you hit 5'9.5 which I think is a good height to find a woman that is average height or slightly above average for a female like 5'6 5'7 and still make her feel womanly and protected
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Apoplectic

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #19 on: May 06, 2019, 09:55:21 PM »

5ft 7 is typically taller than women by 3-4 inches in the west so it's a good height and it's pretty much the point where most dudes stop experiencing heightism.

Don't become too fixated on heigh in terms of numbers, be rational. At 5ft 7,in terms of attracting women, face and body becomes more important.

Also most women are bad at judging height because they view the world looking up and fail to factor in that their eyes are roughly in the middle of their head. With this in mind it's far easier to get away with adding a few inches to your height which is why every guy says their 6ft when in reality we know that being that height is still quite rare.
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Betagur7

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Re: Do tall friends and relatives try to talk you out of doing LL?
« Reply #20 on: May 07, 2019, 03:11:24 AM »

yea i dont even bother telling people cause i know wouldnt understand i just plan on letting them see the results before and after.
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