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[Bournelli]

  Hey everyone, as some users know, I am having very badly severe height neurosis and that is leading to my constantly spouting a series of extreme statements like being short is equivalent to having Leukemia or similar stuffs so I wanna put my mental predicamnt to the end before I am punished by mods here to get me lost out of this forum due to my posts.
  I consulted a psychiatrist specialized in Depression and Anxiety Disorder in the center of Shanghai and he is a stylish 50+ y.o psychiatrist with good patiences and attitudes towards me and at first he asked the reason why I got Depression and I said it was bc I am short. And he kinda laughed out but that was anticipated by me cuz I know it's kinda hilarious to hold frequent intentions and even behaviours of suicide(Around 15 y.o I tried jumping for 4 times and hanging for 2 times to kill myself due to height dysphoria). Yeah you know what is next and afterwards he started to impose positive ideologies onto me through giving inspiring positive anecdotes about how successful and charming those short men he came across and knows of and tbh I didn't achieve any inspirations at all cuz I know they are just babysitting. And at last after he added some encouragements like I am promising and excellent except height and don't get too obsessed with height.
But for unknown reasons I burst out my extreme statments that I ever said on this forum:I'd rather choose Leukemia and Ebola than being short and blah blah. And he opened his mouth bc he was shocked a lot and laughed it off and shouted 'What?'. atm I knew I should've not thrown that kind of statements to him and finally he poured a backet of cold water onto me by saying 'Emm... All right. It seems to me that your height neurosis is more severe than my expectations.. Well.. Just take it easy young blood.. You don't need to think that way.. Maybe other psychiatrists are better options for you... As for me, maybe I cannot eradicate your mental problems.. Sorry.'
And in great despair I hurried back home and I posted the process of the whole consultation. What's your take?
I can't help thinking that way that having horrible diseases like poliomyelitis or osteocarcinoma is better than being short and it seems to me that no one can help me inhibiting this kind of negative thoughts to reside in my mind. I am rn at a loss what to do.
I am getting ready for Paley's Option 5 and considering to sell one of my houses for LL. I think $740K is definitely adequate for Option 5

[Highest]

I get your upset because your short and genetics didn't go your way however there are many short people who are not only short but have no one that even cares about them.

You have parents who will sell their damn house for you to get taller! Think about that.

[Bournelli]

I get your upset because your short and genetics didn't go your way however there are many short people who are not only short but have no one that even cares about them.

You have parents who will sell their damn house for you to get taller! Think about that.

Actually I've yet to make a headup to them that I sell that house for doing surgeries otherwise they will spank me for real!
I just told them I need that house to be sold and they don't ask me about my intentions any further.
But eitherway, IMO height is way more important than physical health, not to mention house.

[Highest]

Actually I've yet to make a headup to them that I sell that house for doing surgeries otherwise they will spank me for real!
I just told them I need that house to be sold and they don't ask me about my intentions any further.
But eitherway, IMO height is way more important than physical health, not to mention house.

Let me get this right, you have told your parents to sell their house and give you money but you didn't even tell them what for and they said yes?

[Bournelli]

Let me get this right, you have told your parents to sell their house and give you money but you didn't even tell them what for and they said yes?

Yeah. They are really that random at selling house LOL.

[Highest]

Yeah. They are really that random at selling house LOL.

Do you understand that most people on this forum who are in their 20s 30s even 40s have had to work for years to pay for this surgery and you are getting it for free? And you are still complaining

[Medium Drink Of Water]

He doesn't sound very good, but few outside of the west are.  You need someone who'll help you to get the right medications through trial-and-error, and you need to do your best as well.  Some medications made me feel worse before they made me feel better.

[Bournelli]

He doesn't sound very good, but few outside of the west are.  You need someone who'll help you to get the right medications through trial-and-error, and you need to do your best as well.  Some medications made me feel worse before they made me feel better.

I took Escitalopram oxalate and Lithium Carbonate Sustained-release Tablets on a daily basis before and due to the ineffectivenesses I ceased to take them and at last I bagan to mitigate my depression by myself without medications.

[Bournelli]

Do you understand that most people on this forum who are in their 20s 30s even 40s have had to work for years to pay for this surgery and you are getting it for free? And you are still complaining

Personally I don't feel lucky at all at this point. I am only 162ish at night and come from the most heightism country although per se heightism is globalizing but you know China is always making jokes like 12 y.o average height is 183cm and men under 185cm are disabled. So 178cm cannot satisfy those toxic girls and they are convinced men not over 180cm are the shortest of the Genz cohort.

[Exxon]

Until you fall more deeper into trouble in life you never realise how lucky you are. Don't follow that incel mindset where you believe you are unlucky because other people have it better than you and then start to grow an uncontrollable hatred on others.

You're lucky to be gaining 800K USD for your property and not having to work years for it so at least feel great for that, you can literally retire and never work in your life again if you invest that property but most of us here on the forum will be working our asses off till we're 65 years old. Don't you feel lucky about that? Life is not always about height.

I don't know how bad it is, but heightism is not only exclusive to China but everywhere in the world and since the dawn of mankind, being shorter than the average is discriminated in all parts of the world except it may not be as explicit as China but more indirect (and this could actually be worse). Don't be impatient, get the surgery and move on with your life.

[Bournelli]

Until you fall more deeper into trouble in life you never realise how lucky you are. Don't follow that incel mindset where you believe you are unlucky because other people have it better than you and then start to grow an uncontrollable hatred on others.

You're lucky to be gaining 800K USD for your property and not having to work years for it so at least feel great for that, you can literally retire and never work in your life again if you invest that property but most of us here on the forum will be working our asses off till we're 65 years old. Don't you feel lucky about that? Life is not always about height.

I don't know how bad it is, but heightism is not only exclusive to China but everywhere in the world and since the dawn of mankind, being shorter than the average is discriminated in all parts of the world except it may not be as explicit as China but more indirect (and this could actually be worse). Don't be impatient, get the surgery and move on with your life.

Before this post I made multiple posts about how god-awfully heightism in China is going on and if to make story short, men under 180cm are considered the shortest of the Genz cohort and 185cm are considered only around average in 12 y.o Genz cohort. So girls are even despising men under 185cm in China rn! I am really lost in how to tacked with this kind of st irl but that has even become one of the reasons why I gotta migrate over other countries!

[Medium Drink Of Water]

men under 180cm are considered the shortest of the Genz cohort and 185cm are considered only around average in 12 y.o Genz cohort. So girls are even despising men under 185cm in China rn! I am really lost in how to tacked with this kind of st irl but that has even become one of the reasons why I gotta migrate over other countries!

This is not true.  You're believing a lie and feeling bad because of it.  These are online trolls you're talking to.  They're trying to make you feel bad, and they're winning.

[Bournelli]

This is not true.  You're believing a lie and feeling bad because of it.  These are online trolls you're talking to.  They're trying to make you feel bad, and they're winning.

I am not only referring to those trollers. I posted a thread about this topic that height inflation in China is very terrifying and I said in that post that I joined 10+ groups of Depression where gather a cluster of Depression patients and they are also very misconceptional about height and very prone to bragging about or bluffing about height, not exclusive to trollers cuz those ppl are not trollers.

[zaozari]

  Hey everyone, as some users know, I am having very badly severe height neurosis and that is leading to my constantly spouting a series of extreme statements like being short is equivalent to having Leukemia or similar stuffs so I wanna put my mental predicamnt to the end before I am punished by mods here to get me lost out of this forum due to my posts.
  I consulted a psychiatrist specialized in Depression and Anxiety Disorder in the center of Shanghai and he is a stylish 50+ y.o psychiatrist with good patiences and attitudes towards me and at first he asked the reason why I got Depression and I said it was bc I am short. And he kinda laughed out but that was anticipated by me cuz I know it's kinda hilarious to hold frequent intentions and even behaviours of suicide(Around 15 y.o I tried jumping for 4 times and hanging for 2 times to kill myself due to height dysphoria). Yeah you know what is next and afterwards he started to impose positive ideologies onto me through giving inspiring positive anecdotes about how successful and charming those short men he came across and knows of and tbh I didn't achieve any inspirations at all cuz I know they are just babysitting. And at last after he added some encouragements like I am promising and excellent except height and don't get too obsessed with height.
But for unknown reasons I burst out my extreme statments that I ever said on this forum:I'd rather choose Leukemia and Ebola than being short and blah blah. And he opened his mouth bc he was shocked a lot and laughed it off and shouted 'What?'. atm I knew I should've not thrown that kind of statements to him and finally he poured a backet of cold water onto me by saying 'Emm... All right. It seems to me that your height neurosis is more severe than my expectations.. Well.. Just take it easy young blood.. You don't need to think that way.. Maybe other psychiatrists are better options for you... As for me, maybe I cannot eradicate your mental problems.. Sorry.'
And in great despair I hurried back home and I posted the process of the whole consultation. What's your take?
I can't help thinking that way that having horrible diseases like poliomyelitis or osteocarcinoma is better than being short and it seems to me that no one can help me inhibiting this kind of negative thoughts to reside in my mind. I am rn at a loss what to do.
I am getting ready for Paley's Option 5 and considering to sell one of my houses for LL. I think $740K is definitely adequate for Option 5

You need to find a psychiatrist or psychologist specialised in Body dysphoria. It's not common but in such a big city as Shangai you surely find one. Depression and anxiety disorder are clearly "secondary" to your neurosis now becoming a severe dysphoria at the edge of psychotic illness.

Use your time to treat yourself psychologically as otherwise you will get worse and won't even be prepared to the LL journey.
As in another positive post of yours, take the time also to personal development activities. Start by search ideas in self help books as you said, for example.
And stop offending people. Atract people, don't repel them by being disgusting and pathological.

[zaozari]

I took Escitalopram oxalate and Lithium Carbonate Sustained-release Tablets on a daily basis before and due to the ineffectivenesses I ceased to take them and at last I bagan to mitigate my depression by myself without medications.

It's a mistake. You need to change medication but still need medication for sure. Depression rarely improves at first farmacological attempt. Or even at second. Or third.
And you need simultaneous regular, maybe twice a week, good quality psychotherapy.
Use your money where you need it, wisely!

[Bournelli]

You need to find a psychiatrist or psychologist specialised in Body dysphoria. It's not common but in such a big city as Shangai you surely find one. Depression and anxiety disorder are clearly "secondary" to your neurosis now becoming a severe dysphoria at the edge of psychotic illness.

Use your time to treat yourself psychologically as otherwise you will get worse and won't even be prepared to the LL journey.
As in another positive post of yours, take the time also to personal development activities. Start by search ideas in self help books as you said, for example.
And stop offending people. Atract people, don't repel them by being disgusting and pathological.

I am not fighting against your mandate of me stopping offending ppl but it's kinda interesting that on r/short I posted my extreme viewpoints like those stuffs that agitated you to keep hostile towards me but users there either consoled me or voted me up/admitted what I said. It seems this kind of 'intoxicated' ideologies are a bandwagon in nowadays judgemental society and I am really not attempting to offend anyone, instead, I am all the time jut expressing what is on my mind. Though you gotta get angry at what I will say next, I still wanna say I am really thinking that way and I am persuaded by myself that is a fact.
Once I went to hospital to medically examine my ophthalmologic health panels to get ready for Vitrectomy to cure eyefloaters, I came across a old woman with Quadriplegia(or Parkinson, I can't tell them) and she was taken good cares of medical stuff including doctors and nurses also in addition to her families and a old man using a cane to walk along the corridor who was also 185+cm tall even though with a severe cyophosis and I projected(a psychological terminology)myself onto them and at lesat compared to being short, I don't think they are unlucky but the really unlucky one is me. So I am not just ignorant of what those diseases mean to me and I am really convinced being short is way worse than many devastatin diseases.

[173to187USTORUSSIA]

.

[Bournelli]

Stay away from all antidepressants except Wellbutrin. They all cause dependence, sxxual dysfunction (sometimes permanent, weight gain and low libido.)

Wellbutrin is the only antidepressant I would ever take as it acts on dopamine and is not a dangerous SSRI.

I recommend you get your testosterone checked, get on testosterone replacement therapy if your T comes back low and begin an exercise regimen repeatedly (Begin with at least 3 days a week and move up from there.

-173to187

Thx for your introductions bro. But I think I am overwhelmed in height dysphoria just bc I have yet to figure out a way to release my accmulated mental burdens.
Months ago I found out a way which sets free my 'intoxicated'(in my eyes it is not at all but in some users' eyes here they are intoxicating and offensive as hell) thought out of my mind onto this forum and I am really feeling this way is working on me positively so that I detected my mental burdens are really reduced by stating that kind of 'dark' thoughts.
But you know what is the circumstance after I stated that kind of thoghts so I am conceiving new ways to release burdens but until rn still haven't I conceived any one.
If any I will share it with your guys.

[ReadRothbard]

Before this post I made multiple posts about how god-awfully heightism in China is going on and if to make story short, men under 180cm are considered the shortest of the Genz cohort and 185cm are considered only around average in 12 y.o Genz cohort. So girls are even despising men under 185cm in China rn! I am really lost in how to tacked with this kind of st irl but that has even become one of the reasons why I gotta migrate over other countries!

They're lying by 15 cm minimum lol. 168 cm is in the 97th percentile of height for 13-year-old males in the West. Do you really think China is inhabited by giants? Come on.

[Medium Drink Of Water]

They're lying by 15 cm minimum lol. 168 cm is in the 97th percentile of height for 13-year-old males in the West. Do you really think China is inhabited by giants? Come on.

Unfortunately, he does.  He needs a better psychiatrist.

[ReadRothbard]

Unfortunately, he does.  He needs a better psychiatrist.

But how is it even possible to think this? Not even Chinese government statistics say this.

[Bournelli]

But how is it even possible to think this? Not even Chinese government statistics say this.

So that is why I was complaining about how toxic nowadays Chineses are being and I am also curious where this kind of twisted perception of height derive from. I've also seen pupils and teenagers and their average heights are self-complanatorily not that tall. Those bluffers are freaking out IMO.

[Medium Drink Of Water]

I am also curious where this kind of twisted perception of height derive from.

Your own sick mind.

[Highest]

So that is why I was complaining about how toxic nowadays Chineses are being and I am also curious where this kind of twisted perception of height derive from. I've also seen pupils and teenagers and their average heights are self-complanatorily not that tall. Those bluffers are freaking out IMO.

It's not a chinese thing it would happen everywhere you go. If you lived in the USA as a 162cm boy you would have been bullied horribly in high school. I'm not sure why you think you think Chinese people are more discriminatory.

[Bournelli]

It's not a chinese thing it would happen everywhere you go. If you lived in the USA as a 162cm boy you would have been bullied horribly in high school. I'm not sure why you think you think Chinese people are more discriminatory.

And you also came across Americans who inflate average height as much as Chineses mentioned above?

[Medium Drink Of Water]

And you also came across Americans who inflate average height as much as Chineses mentioned above?

Yeah.  I've talked to so many American kids online who claim to be lots of things they're not.  They lie about their age, jobs, wealth, martial arts ability, you name it.  They're not to be taken seriously.

[Highest]

And you also came across Americans who inflate average height as much as Chineses mentioned above?

Yes

[Bournelli]

That's out of my knowledges.
I am always convinced only Chineses and Koreans are very liable to inflate the average heights, at least I myself have seen very few Caucasian/Black users online posting nonsenses like 12 y.o average height is 183cm or I don't feel I am tall at all standing at 190cm and similar stuffs.
I am also hoping you guys can share the experience about how those guys you came across inflated the average heights.

[Bournelli]

Yeah.  I've talked to so many American kids online who claim to be lots of things they're not.  They lie about their age, jobs, wealth, martial arts ability, you name it.  They're not to be taken seriously.

BTW, have you banned that guy named 173to185USAtoRUSSIA? That guy was banned before cuz of consistently spouting racism bs  in my post and now he opened a new account to repeat what he did before. Kinda dumb and boring and I think he's just diverting himself from height neurosis+frustrations led by other aspects of life onto racism stuffs. If he is not even typical of troller then I don't know what on Earth the rules of this forum actually are.

[zaozari]

BTW, have you banned that guy named 173to185USAtoRUSSIA? That guy was banned before cuz of consistently spouting racism bs  in my post and now he opened a new account to repeat what he did before. Kinda dumb and boring and I think he's just diverting himself from height neurosis+frustrations led by other aspects of life onto racism stuffs. If he is not even typical of troller then I don't know what on Earth the rules of this forum actually are.

The rules are apparently a lot of tolerance, probably more than I would have starting with you. You are accusing somebody, maybe rightly, of racism (or you just made him lose his temper completely) but you go even further discriminating and disrespecting shorter and severely ill people like those with dementia.
Don't push too much for banning on others until you finally realize the disgusting posts you often publish and look yourself in the mirror. Even your language is discriminatory and out of date. What is a "caucasian" nowadays?  A totally milky skin, blonde guy with blue eyes? Wake up to the 21th century in free and modern societies: everybody has a mixed genetic background. Where do you find "pure" latins, black, white people? "Race" applied to humans is not even a scientific concept.

[Highest]

The rules are apparently a lot of tolerance, probably more than I would have starting with you. You are accusing somebody, maybe rightly, of racism (or you just made him lose his temper completely) but you go even further discriminating and disrespecting shorter and severely ill people like those with dementia.
Don't push too much for banning on others until you finally realize the disgusting posts you often publish and look yourself in the mirror. Even your language is discriminatory and out of date. What is a "caucasian" nowadays?  A totally milky skin, blonde guy with blue eyes? Wake up to the 21th century in free and modern societies: everybody has a mixed genetic background. Where do you find "pure" latins, black, white people? "Race" applied to humans is not even a scientific concept.

Are Chinese people mixed then?